Title: Rocking the Boat
Author: bnomiko
Rating: PG-13
Pairing(s): Valon + Jou, mention of Seto + Yami, Rafael + Valon + Amelda, Mai + Jou
Spoilers: none... post-Orichalcos Doom arc
Warnings: swearing
Disclaimer: Yu-Gi-Oh! is the creation of Kazuki Takahashi. This is a not-for-profit fanwork and I do not own any of these characters.
Summary: What happens when Yami, Jou and Valon go nude sunbathing on a yacht? Place your bets... Written for the KnY Different Pairings Challenge.
Status: 1 / 1
Archived at: http://www.phenixsol.com/Miko/FF/

This is a SHONEN-AI fic (male + male romantic relationship). If you are offended by homosexual relationships, please do not read this. Flames will be disregarded.

• NOT a part of my Kai-baby and Yami-kins AU, but I based the setting for this story on that AU. So Yami has his own body and is separate from Yugi.
• This story is a sort of rewrite of a scene in my "The Boys of Summer" fic (Ch. 4: Come Sail Away) - if you haven't read it yet... shame on you (j/k). The quick summary is Seto, Yami and Valon go sailing on Fourth of July on Valon's yacht, the Phoenix Gravitation. There's a brief mention that Yami and Valon are out tanning in the buff and being an idiot, I didn't really expand on that. What yummy potential! But this time, I've added Amelda, Mai and Jou to the mix for no apparent reason other than to do it :D

* * *

Rocking the Boat

* * *

"Now now, you've got to take it all off, mate, or else you're going to end up with a real nasty tan line," Valon said airily from his prone position on the towel. "Yami doesn't have a problem with it, isn't that right?"

"Of course I don't. I'm here to get a tan," the former Pharaoh answered, his voice somewhat muffled by the face pillow he was lying upon. He had his lithe, naked body fully stretched out on his towel, the tanning oil causing his skin to glow in the sun.

Valon took a nice long moment to admire Yami's glorious butt. "Now see? We're all guys; you don't have anything I haven't seen before, Jou."

"Yeah, but you're both gay."

"Actually, I'm bi."

"Gay, bi, same diff!"

"Jounouchi," Yami said, his voice low in warning.

"Oh geez. Fine." The blonde turned around and began tugging off his board shorts. "And you better not be checking out my ass, Valon!"

"Ah nuts, you caught me!" Valon exclaimed with a chuckle.

Jou slapped his hands over his buttcheeks. "Yaaami, tell me he's not..."

"No one is looking at your ass, Jou. Just lie down."

Jou grumbled to himself and hesitantly lay down on his towel, then rolled over onto his side, trying to find a position that was comfortable. The deck was as hard as rock... why did Valon and Yami look so cozy? "Okay, call me crazy, but how did ya both get so comfy?"

Valon glanced over and took advantage of the dark lenses of his sunglasses, surreptitiously sweeping his gaze over Jou's toned abs and downwards. "What're you talking about?"

"Well, for starters, this towel ain't cuttin' it. And it's damn hot out here!"

The Aussie snorted. "Of course it's hot out! How else are we supposed to get tanned, you dill?"

"Hey, now that sounded like an insult!"

"At least I didn't call you... what was it, ah... puppy? Mutt? Whichever Kaiba uses."

"Them's fightin' words!" Jou yelled, his fist clenching automatically.

Yami rolled his eyes, though his shades hid the action. "Jou, Valon, stop it."

"He started it!" the blonde complained, pointing at the smug brunette lying in between them.

The Sennen Eye glinted momentarily on Yami's forehead, then he gave up on it and sighed. "Look, I'm on vacation, I want a tan, and I while I don't mind you both talking, I don't want to hear you two yelling at each other, all right?"

"Yes daddy," Valon responded, smirking nastily. The crimson-eyed teen reached out and jabbed him on the arm.

"Yeah, fine... sorry, Yami." Jou threw himself back down on his towel, rolled over several more times, and finally ended up settling for lying on his back with his hands cradling his neck.

So... having fun yet? Seto's voice rolled through Yami's head.

Well, I haven't Mind Crushed anyone yet. Sure you don't want to come out and join us, Kai-baby?

Actually, I'm up on the bridge right now, where I have a fantastic view of your ass, though I think I might have to blind myself if I accidentally look over at the Mutt one more time. So are you positive you don't want to change your mind about the bet? Valon was checking you out big time.

I'll win. I'm still the King of Games, Baby.

Shut up. Don't give me that crap. If I have to go down there and tie you up with a big bow on top of your head and hand you over on a silver platter, I'll do it.

Yami smirked. Now THAT would be cheating. So are Mai and Amelda up there as well?

Amelda is. Mai's inside.

Tell them both I want to up the stakes. I bet that Valon not only makes a move on Jou, but that he'll do it in the next half-hour, and that Jou reciprocates. If she agrees to it and it happens, you and Amelda have to pay us off in triple.

Without blatant interference and without you leaving? Ha! Not going to happen. You're on.

* * *

Ten minutes later, Yami rolled over and stood up, stretching, tiny beads of sweat shimmering on his skin. He knew Valon was watching him, but if he wanted to win the bet, he was going to have to direct the Aussie's attention to the other sunbather on the deck with them.

"Jou, you want to use the pillow? You're going to burn pretty fast if you just lie on your back.

"Huh? What? Oh, sure Yami. Thanks!"

Yami tossed the pillow over, making sure that it wouldn't actually make it over to the blonde duelist. "Oops, sorry about that, Valon."

The Aussie picked the pillow off his knee. "No problem. Here you go, Jounouchi."

"Uh... thanks." Jou sat up and tried to arrange himself comfortably on his stomach. "Man, tanning takes a lot of work."

"Jou, you need tanning oil too?" Yami held up the bottle and dangled it from his thumb and forefinger.

"I dunno if I can get it onto my own back," Jou answered sheepishly

Valon suddenly brightened up and snatched the bottle from Yami. "Here, let me do it for you!"

"Um... no thanks?"

"Really! I insist! I'll behave... right Yami?"

That's right, Valon, do your thing! Yami gave a slight nod in agreement and lay back down, confident that things would go as planned.

Jou eyed Valon skeptically, but since he couldn't think of a good argument against it, he finally said, "Well... okay. Just keep your hands off my butt, okay?"

"Er, sure..." The brunette poured a liberal amount of oil onto his hands, then began massaging it into the blonde's skin, starting from the base of the neck and working his way down from there. "Feels pretty good, doesn't it?"

"Aw, shuddap! Don't get any weird ideas." But it did feel good, and Jou couldn't resist arching his back a little into Valon's hands, much to the brunette's delight.

* * *

Mai wandered up onto the bridge while both Seto and Amelda were watching the action on the deck below. She frowned a little... with Amelda up on the bridge where Valon could possibly see or hear him, the Aussie might be a bit more reluctant to take things to the next level with Jou. It looks like Yami's got things rolling out on the deck, but I need to work some strategy up here... Mai cleared her throat loudly to get the attention of the other two duelists. "So how's it going, boys?"

"15 more minutes and you lose," the redhead remarked, his voice soft so that the trio of sunbathers wouldn't hear him.

"Hmph. I took a peek earlier. Valon's all over Jou. Yami and I are going to win this bet easily."

Seto turned around and regarded the busty blonde. "Remember you agreed to the new stipulation that the Mutt has to reciprocate too."

"He will," Mai said confidently. Once I get Amelda off the bridge. "I've always had my suspicions that he's a closet bisexual, like Otogi."

"That's an interesting thing to say about your boyfr... wait, Otogi's bi?"

"Kaiba, he wears more makeup than I do, and... have you been to his place? Oh my good God, the amount of styling products he's got..."

Amelda chuckled. "Maybe your friend is just really metro."

"Please, Amelda. I've been around long enough to know a gay or somewhat gay man when I see one. Jou's no straighter than Otogi or Pegasus or either of you two. He's just repressed."

"Hn. Whatever. You're still going to lose. I'm just making sure Yami doesn't cheat, because that's what it's going to take to get the Mutt to reciprocate."

"You know better than to think Yami would cheat," Mai scolded Seto. "And besides, you two look like you're melting up here. Come on inside and grab a drink. I make a mean Long Island Iced Tea."

"Probably not as good as mine," Amelda countered, a glint in his eye.

"Oh yeah? Wanna put your money where your mouth is, hon? How about a side bet, and Kaiba can be the judge?"

Seto shook his head and went back to Yami-gazing.

"Okay, you're on. What's the bet?"

Mai smiled deviously and leaned in to whisper, "Well, once Yami and I win our bet..."

"IF."

"Ahem. Once we win our bet, I want you to storm out onto the deck and make a big scene over Jou leading Valon on."

"Uh, why?"

"Just because. It'd be funny!"

The redhead gave the violet-eyed blonde a skeptical look. "Valon's going to know I'm faking it..."

"Oh, I don't care what Valon thinks. I just want to see Jou's expression!"

Amelda frowned. "That's kinda mean."

"You're only saying that because you didn't see his little practical joke a few weeks back. Trust me, I deserve a little revenge!"

* * *

Valon couldn't help but notice Amelda and Seto leaving the bridge with Mai. Grinning to himself, he continued to massage the tanning lotion into Jou's lower back, admiring the blonde's muscles as they twitched at his touch. It's a shame he isn't gay or at least bi... bi would be hot, because then maybe we could convince Mai to join us in a three-way... or maybe Yami. Yeah, the Pharaoh's got a great bod for a little guy. But he does have that scary Mind Crush thing going, and Kaiba's kinda scary too and possessive as all hell, but he's super sexy. Ooh, I know - me, Jou, Mai, Yami and Kaiba! But we wouldn't all fit in a bed. Maybe we could push two beds together...

"Hey, I told ya to keep your hands off my ass!"

"Huh?" Valon looked down to see both of his hands firmly planted on Jou's buttcheeks. "Ah... sorry about that, mate." Heh, I'm so full of it. He couldn't resist giving the firm globes a quick squeeze before pouring more oil on his hands.

"Okay, like, I think I'm oiled up enOUGH! Jesus!! What the fuck?!" Jou raised himself up and glowered over his shoulder at Valon, who was chuckling under his breath.

"Oops, my hand slipped?"

"In between my legs?! Yami, can I ask you for a favor? Mind Crush this idiot for me, please?"

Yami gave an extra loud fake snore and didn't even bother opening his eyes.

"Aw man... fine, be that way!"

"You know, Jou, you're really spunky. I don't know why I never noticed before."

What? "Don't you have a boyfriend? Two, as a matter of fact? One of which is built like a tree and prolly capable of poppin' off our heads if he finds out about what yer tryin' to pull here?"

A slightly bitter smile twisted Valon's lips. "You... you really think Amelda and Rafael hooked up with me without knowing how I am? That's a bit of an insult right there. Besides, I've never gone so far as to actually cheat on them, you know. I just like to have a bit of fun. But I know my limits."

"Have fun somewh..." Valon reached up and grabbed a handful of blonde hair, and before Jou could protest, the brunette was right on top of him, locking their lips together.

Brown eyes widened as Valon expertly slid the edge of his tongue over Jou's lower lip, then darted it momentarily into the blonde duelist's mouth. Taking advantage of Jou's distraction, Valon use his weight to flip Jou completely over onto his back, then pressed his body down to slide over hot, oil-slicked skin, his hands idly playing over the taut abdomen that had first caught his attention. Those splendid muscles rippled at his touch, and Jou let out a low moan as Valon circled a finger around the indent of his navel.

Yami didn't even look over at the other two sunbathers to know that he was on the verge of winning the bet. Oh, he was so looking forward to claiming his prize. But he wasn't so foolish as to begin celebrating prematurely, so the ex-spirit just smiled inwardly and continued to bask in the sun.

Jou was just beginning to melt into the kiss when Valon suddenly nipped his lower lip and pulled away, a challenging and mischievous twinkle in his blue eyes.

The blonde blinked in surprise. Valon was really a good kisser, even if he was a guy. Jou couldn't even remember what they had been arguing about a few moments prior. "What... made ya..."

"Ah... noticed you never denied being bi yourself. Isn't it a bit unfair calling me names, when you're the same as me?"

"But... I'm with Mai!"

"Believe me, I'd love to be with Mai too. But you're just as hot."

With a low growl rumbling in the back of his throat, Jou lunged upwards and caught Valon's mouth with his own. Flinging one arm around the back of the Aussie's neck, Jou used the other to lower them both back onto the deck, then worked it down Valon's ribcage, creeping steadily towards a tanned, round...

A sudden popping, fizzing noise caught Jou's attention. He twisted his head away from Valon's just in time to see Mai standing at the side of the deck, a smug grin on her face and an open can of soda in hand. "Oh look, a pair of HUMPback whales engaged in some sort of mating ritual," she commented, lifting the drink to her lips.

"Mai! Oh my God! It's... it's not what it looks like!" Jou gasped, giving Valon a good shove to dislodge him.

"Of course it's what it looks like! You were kissing me!" Valon complained, then he turned to Mai. "Care to join us, Mai?"

"Oh, believe me, I'd love to," she purred, letting her eyes slowly roam over all three of the exposed bodies before her, "but I was just heading in for a MASSAGE. Yami, you coming with?"

The crimson-eyed teen smirked and stood up gracefully, fetching his shorts and slipping them back on. "Yes, a MASSAGE sounds good right about now. Especially a HALF-HOUR one, isn't that right?"

"Yep." She winked at Yami as he sauntered past her, then turned to a baffled Jou and Valon and blew them both a kiss before walking away.

"Okay... what just happened? Did we miss sumthin'?" Jou asked. Valon just shrugged, then pounced on the blonde teen again. "Damnit! Get off me, you nut!"

"Oh my God!!!" Amelda suddenly stormed out onto the deck, glowering fiercely at the two nude duelists.

Jou squeaked and ducked his head, but Valon caught a quick glimpse of amusement in Amelda's gray eyes. "Hello, Amelda... care to join us?" Valon asked flippantly.

Barely able to keep a straight face, Amelda turned to Jou and yelled, "Jounouchi, how dare you make a pass at my boyfriend? I can't believe it!"

"Wha... hey, wait a minute! He made a move on me first!" Jou argued. Valon blinked at him innocently, blue eyes wide with fake bafflement.

"I saw you grab him by the neck and kiss him; don't deny it! And you looked like you were going to grab his ass!" the redhead cried, looking every bit the distraught boyfriend.

"I... I... no way! I'm with Mai!" Jou looked around wildly, then saw his girlfriend standing with Yami and Seto on the side of the deck, watching the argument with laughter in their eyes. "Mai... YAMI, tell him!"

Mai just giggled and Yami leaned against Seto, smirking broadly.

Amelda cleared his throat and took a step back, turning his head to look at the trio behind him. "So was that good enough, Mai?"

"All right, Amelda. I guess that counts. Sorry, Jou. I put him up to it. Consider it as payback for three weeks ago"

"You... huh?? Oh, that..." Jou smiled sheepishly and scratched his head.

Amelda cocked his head and gave Jou a slight smile. "Since I'll be stuck giving your girlfriend a massage for the next half-hour, if you and Valon want to suck face, well... I don't care. Just don't let it get any further than that."

Now it was Valon's turn to look bewildered. "Massage? What's all this crap about massages anyways?"

Seto ended up responding. "Amelda, Yami, Mai and myself... we made a bet for a ten-minute massage based on who you'd make a move on first, Yami or Jou. Amelda and I thought you'd go for Yami. Yami and Mai thought you'd go for the Mutt. Turns out your taste in men, or in this case, puppies, isn't as good as I thought it was."

Yami tried to glower at his lover for insulting his two friends, but frankly, he really didn't care at the moment, considering that there was a nice, soothing massage to look forward to. "Anyways... I tripled the stakes by saying that not only would you chose to make a move on Jou, but that you'd do it within a half-hour and that Jou would reciprocate," the former Pharaoh clarified. "So Baby, ready to pay up?"

Seto grumbled something about puppy love and followed his boyfriend off the deck and towards the salon. Amelda gave Valon a long look, then chuckled and followed after Seto and Yami. Jou and Valon turned to Mai, who remained behind, smirking at the two of them.

"Mai, I can't believe you'd bet on such a thing!" Jou finally said.

"Sorry, Sugar. But I couldn't resist a good challenge."

"So you really thought I wouldn't pull anything on the Pharaoh, Mai?" Valon asked, thinking once again of Yami's sexy, bronzed body. "Can't say I wasn't tempted."

"Honestly... I really would have thought you'd have gone for Yami. But Yami made the initial bet and I wasn't so stupid as to go against him. Betting against the King of Games? Ha! No way. But I'll catch ya later boys, and try not to have too much fun without me, hmm? If this boat starts a-rockin'... someone's going overboard!"

* * *

~ OWARI ~

• Originally this was going to be a Valon + Yami fic. But the Prideshipper in me wouldn't let me doooo iiiiit. So it ended up being Valon + Jou instead. They look better together anyways. And Jou has hot abs *drools* But stupid Jou... he wanted to be straight >< and the best I could manage was to make him bi. Sorry if this fic sucks... I tried but... LOL
• Tanning is bad for you. But who cares... you didn't read this to learn about that :p
• So what was the practical joke Jou played on Mai? Dunno :) - I just needed an excuse for her to be a wee bit mean to him.
• Re: Aussie slang. "Dill" = idiot, "Spunky" = attractive.

August 22, 2005